A weekend for choices and a project undertaken...what's not to like?

So, I finally sat down and began vigorously writing this past week. Don't want to say too much about it as it is still in the fetal stage at only about 10 pages. But it feels good to have the ideas flowing out of my brain onto the page. Usually they just flow out to nowhere. Yay for progress, I suppose. But I like how it feels. What I've written so far seems very organic, not forced. I've set for myself what I feel is a very easy-to-reach goal of writing two pages a day. So far, so good.

This weekend will involve a gathering of cousins for fun and frivolity. I'm excited as this is not something that happens very often and we're attempting to make it a more regular thing. It's retarded since we grew up together and now that we're all grown up, we all live no more than 10 miles from each other (some like 5 minutes away!). Every family gathering we talk about getting together but nothing happens, so here we go. Actions, not words! Huzzah!

Also happening this weekend, my wife said something to me yesterday about going out this weekend. As I have expressed on these very pages previously, I am total cinephile. Unfortunately, through a combination of kids, time and lack of funds, this happens so rarely it's more of an occurrence than a happening. But this weekend, we are gonna indulge that desire and do it. But now, the question becomes: what to see? There are three things up that I really want to see. It's hard to pick just one. My three choices are "Black Swan", "The King's Speech" or True Grit. Each has things pulling me to it but right now, I am leaning towards "The King's Speech". Every year, I bemoan the fact that when the Oscars arrive I haven't seen any of the nominated films. Not this year. This year...it's personal.
Those last few sentences you should imagine with the movie trailer guy's voice saying it; a close up of my face, eyes squinting with intensity; and ominous and cinematic music behind me.

So, if you were voting for a movie for me to see, what would it be? Give me your reasons. Next week sometime, I'll post what I went to see and my pitifully inadequate review. Good weekend to you all and to all, a good weekend.

Be a better lover and please her with your enormous foot...

Ha! I could hear you pondering, wondering "Will the infamous Robot Monkey post another blog before the year ends? Will he continue any of the supposed ongoing columns, like 'Date Night' or 'The Best of... List'? Is it true his tears will heal a unicorn of flatulence?"

First, the answer to your last query...yes, they do. Also, they act as a unicorn aphrodisiac, which yes, is slightly disturbing.

Second, to your next question...undecided. I honestly am just gonna play how I feel. So, maybe.

And thirdly...well, you have answer, don't you? Oh snap.

Now that we have the formalities out of the way, on to the hilarity. Or as I like to call it, the insomnia killer. Yes, it's true. My brand of humor has been know to induce vomiting or sleeping, varying from person to person. Enjoy!

Well, I have had an interesting week last week. And when I say interesting, I mean boring. One of the highlights that I feel compelled to share is clearing out my junk email inbox. Normally, this is done with the minimal of paying attention to subject lines. I usually just look at the addresses, looking for legitimate emails that slip through the cracks. This past week (for whatever reason) I paid closer attention than I normally would have to the subject lines listed herein. I was rewarded with a menagerie of bizarre subjects to emails that I would never have believed. So without further ado, here are some of the subject lines I actually had in my junk email. No addresses or anything though since I'm not gonna give them free advertising. They are presented here, unedited with all punctuation, grammar and spelling left as is.

(Note: Some of these are sexual in nature and contain some adult language. Reader discretion advised.)








"Engorge her with your mansword"
"Have a much huger erection than she wants"
"Ass rimming the easy way"
"No white rabbit but gold is coming your way"
"Caution! A money opportunity!"
"Someday your prince will come"
"Enlarge your bust 3 times!!!"
"Kan you helps a man fellow?"
"What keeps you young? luving rabbit style!!!!"

And the award for most bizarre goes to...

"Hot latinas banged by Germans"

I'm sure my junk mail is no different than yours but usually I just scan it and don't really read it. Wow.

If we don't talk again before the holidays, Happy Christmas and A Valid New Year!

Shalom!

Once again, sailing the Seas of Bloggery...

So, yeah....lameness.

Let's see: my last couple of blog entries have been posts have been about my lack of a new blog entry. And the last one was apparently last year.

Lame. I know.

So, no more promises. No more lame excuses. No more references to absences on the Seas of Bloggery. Just the blogs. Take 'em or leave 'em. Enjoy them or don't. Now, on with the show.

SO, my wife and I have been trying to find new ways to spend time together. But we're kinda poor and have three kids, so going out is not always an option. So I had an idea. Cinema is one of my passions. Food is one of hers. So I thought, "Why not marry the two?" And the idea of a regular thing is born: dinner and a movie...with a twist. The idea is this: I will pick a movie she has never seen and she will fix a meal in the same theme. This way, we both expose the other person to a new experience while simultaneously sharing our passion with each other. Help us learn a little about each other. I wish we had thought of this years ago.

Nevertheless, we are both excited. For our first date, I select Fellini's 8 1/2, one of my favorite films. Of course, I had a slight ulterior motive in selecting an Italian film.

I have been requesting Chicken Parmigiana (one of my favorites) for some time now. I thought by selecting Italian, I would push her into my corner. Imagine my surprise (and disappointment) when she immediately informed me, that her meal would not be Chicken Parmigiana. Ahhh, man. Instead, she decided on Braised Ribs, polenta and asparagus (which I abstained from since I am not a fan of asparagus). She was going to make tiramisu for desert but apparently the story was out of ladyfingers. Sad face. So, Sunday night arrives. We put the kids in bed and sit down to enjoy dinner, the movie and most importantly each others company.

First, the meal. The ribs were great. The polenta...eh. Reminded me of something akin to oatmeal or grits, that same kind of consistency and texture. Didn't hate it but was not my favorite. It did well mixed with ribs and the gravy from the ribs. All in all, a very enjoyable meal (but still not Chicken Parmigiana...I know, I know, I'll shut up).

Next, the movie. I love this film. I haven't seen it in a couple of years which allowed me to watch it semi-fresh again. Marcello Mastriantonio is Fellini's alter ego in this essentially and is great. Claudia Cardinale is absolutely radiant in her small role as herself and as Mastriantonio's vision of the ideal woman. The movie waltzes from reality to fantasy that by the end of the movie, the lines aren't so much blurred as erased completely. A brilliant portrait of ego, creative block and the pressures of living up to high, almost unreal, expectations. Several films owe their birth to this movie: Stardust Memories, Living In Oblivion, Nine (a musical adapting the movie) and a host of other films. A great film, consistently on top of many "Best of" lists.

Afterwords, we talked about the film: if she liked it, what we liked or didn't like, what did particular things represent, overall impressions, etc; Overall, it was an enjoyable evening of good food, good cinema and good companionship. What more can you ask for?

....except for maybe Chicken Parmigiana :P.

Failing is also half the battle...

So...yeah.

Here's the wiki entry on this.

Then, insert me and a snapshot of this blog under the definition. Yikes.

Has it really been since April since I posted an entry? Just a short paragraph but still a lame ass entry.

Sorry. I wish I could say I'm gonna turn it around and start contributing to this thing religiously but we both know that ain't gonna happen. So, I'll just say this: I will strive to update this thing at least 2 times a month. Any more than that? Well, let's just call anything more a bonus. And in the interest of fair play, since you guys pay good money for this blog, I won't even count this one. So see? You already got bonus this month.

And yes, before one of the 3 or 4 people who actually read this thing, I will finish my list of my favorite albums (course, I have to find my handwritten list first...)as well as my end of year list and other stuff.

So check this spot again soon....

And you stay classy, Internet.

Don't judge me...

Okay, I found the list. Give me a "Hell Yeah!" like I was Stone Cold Steve Austin...whatever that means. So, I should be able to finish this asinine list, which should make some people happy and cause the others to stop bugging me. The rest will probably just get the runs. Oh well, nothing new there. Give me some time and hopefully by next week, I begin finishing this list. And after that's done, I have another list to start but MUCH, MUCH shorter and definitely less intensive. So, to all, a Happy Easter.

I confess....

Alright, as the title implies, I have a confession to make. When I started this new series of my top 100 albums, I have to admit it was not spur of the moment. I had actually taken the time to write out a list. Why is this important, you may ask? In the interest of being a lazy bastard, I put everything on the list so I wouldn't have to come up with them again. And now you're probably asking why I am telling you this? Or you're saying, "Stop putting words in my mouth!" Either way, as you've noticed, I haven't updated this thing in a month and while I have several good reasons, some of which include laziness, tiredness, apathy, being really busy, the main reason being that I can't find my written list. The first couple of entries (as has been stated) were already printed on my MySpace blog site, so all I had to do was clean it up a bit and move it over here. So, gentle readers (all two of you), please be patient as I get this underway again (hopefully with the assist of my list).

A mixed bag, 80-71...

Greetings, fellow inhabitants of this island Earth. It's time for another entry into this mess of a blog. Suck it down and enjoy. Let's continue this little list, shall we? So here we go: "The T.R.M's list of Greatest Albums: 80-71".




80) Black Sunday - Cypress Hill
Love me some Cypress Hill and this was easily their best. There are some delicious songs on this thing. Whether you prefer to listen to this while "enjoying the herb" or in the car, this freaking album does not disappoint.

79) Battle of Los Angeles - Rage Against The Machine
While I may not agree with all of their politics, no one can deny these guys are not supremely talented musicians who have a point of view they don't back down from and you have to admire them for that. And the music and lyrics just flat out blow your mind. One of my all time favorite bands.

78) Ten Sumner's Tales - Sting
Sting is just an amazing musician, either with The Police or as a solo artist. And for me, this is my favorite solo album of his. I still listen to "Fields of Gold" to this day and the images it evokes are as real as memories.

77) Sixteen Stone - Bush
Love 'em or hate 'em, you can't deny that these guys know how to rock. But more than just a bunch of guys making some commercial rock, or latching on to the flaming tail of bands like Nirvana, these guys know how to put out good music and this definitely is one of their best.

76) The White Room - The KLF
I remember when this came out in the 90's and I just thought, "Damn, this is a weird album". And the ideals presented here, are still pretty out there. But these guys still did some cool experimenting in the mixing and we are easily the beneficiaries.

75) Mother's Milk - Red Hot Chili Peppers
This is the one that introduced me the Chili Peppers and I love it. For me, it was a good starting point but I love where these guys evolved to.

74) Hellbilly Deluxe - Rob Zombie
This was Rob's first solo effort (though honestly, he WAS White Zombie). Some great songs and a truly multi-talented artist. Not everyone's cup of tea, but I like him.

73) Thirteen Tales From Urban Bohemia - The Dandy Warhols
A great psuedo pop-rock album. Love the Warhols. Obviously, this had some good, radio friendly tunes on it. This is my favorite album of theirs.

72)
Never Mind The Bollocks - The Sex Pistols
The first great punk album and easily the best. Their only album, they seemed to be a self-fulfilling prophecy of nihilistic degeneration. Kinda bittersweet that they self destructed, one almost wonders what coulda been but also fears the caricature they could have become.

71)
Automatic For The People - R.E.M
Next to "Out Of Time", their most commercially accessible album. I love this thing. Just a great album that is at moments touching, uplifting, depressing and happy. Good thing.

That's all for now. Hopefully this thing isn't too lame. If it is, well, you're reading it. So, drop it and go read a book....