Failing is also half the battle...

So...yeah.

Here's the wiki entry on this.

Then, insert me and a snapshot of this blog under the definition. Yikes.

Has it really been since April since I posted an entry? Just a short paragraph but still a lame ass entry.

Sorry. I wish I could say I'm gonna turn it around and start contributing to this thing religiously but we both know that ain't gonna happen. So, I'll just say this: I will strive to update this thing at least 2 times a month. Any more than that? Well, let's just call anything more a bonus. And in the interest of fair play, since you guys pay good money for this blog, I won't even count this one. So see? You already got bonus this month.

And yes, before one of the 3 or 4 people who actually read this thing, I will finish my list of my favorite albums (course, I have to find my handwritten list first...)as well as my end of year list and other stuff.

So check this spot again soon....

And you stay classy, Internet.

Don't judge me...

Okay, I found the list. Give me a "Hell Yeah!" like I was Stone Cold Steve Austin...whatever that means. So, I should be able to finish this asinine list, which should make some people happy and cause the others to stop bugging me. The rest will probably just get the runs. Oh well, nothing new there. Give me some time and hopefully by next week, I begin finishing this list. And after that's done, I have another list to start but MUCH, MUCH shorter and definitely less intensive. So, to all, a Happy Easter.

I confess....

Alright, as the title implies, I have a confession to make. When I started this new series of my top 100 albums, I have to admit it was not spur of the moment. I had actually taken the time to write out a list. Why is this important, you may ask? In the interest of being a lazy bastard, I put everything on the list so I wouldn't have to come up with them again. And now you're probably asking why I am telling you this? Or you're saying, "Stop putting words in my mouth!" Either way, as you've noticed, I haven't updated this thing in a month and while I have several good reasons, some of which include laziness, tiredness, apathy, being really busy, the main reason being that I can't find my written list. The first couple of entries (as has been stated) were already printed on my MySpace blog site, so all I had to do was clean it up a bit and move it over here. So, gentle readers (all two of you), please be patient as I get this underway again (hopefully with the assist of my list).

A mixed bag, 80-71...

Greetings, fellow inhabitants of this island Earth. It's time for another entry into this mess of a blog. Suck it down and enjoy. Let's continue this little list, shall we? So here we go: "The T.R.M's list of Greatest Albums: 80-71".




80) Black Sunday - Cypress Hill
Love me some Cypress Hill and this was easily their best. There are some delicious songs on this thing. Whether you prefer to listen to this while "enjoying the herb" or in the car, this freaking album does not disappoint.

79) Battle of Los Angeles - Rage Against The Machine
While I may not agree with all of their politics, no one can deny these guys are not supremely talented musicians who have a point of view they don't back down from and you have to admire them for that. And the music and lyrics just flat out blow your mind. One of my all time favorite bands.

78) Ten Sumner's Tales - Sting
Sting is just an amazing musician, either with The Police or as a solo artist. And for me, this is my favorite solo album of his. I still listen to "Fields of Gold" to this day and the images it evokes are as real as memories.

77) Sixteen Stone - Bush
Love 'em or hate 'em, you can't deny that these guys know how to rock. But more than just a bunch of guys making some commercial rock, or latching on to the flaming tail of bands like Nirvana, these guys know how to put out good music and this definitely is one of their best.

76) The White Room - The KLF
I remember when this came out in the 90's and I just thought, "Damn, this is a weird album". And the ideals presented here, are still pretty out there. But these guys still did some cool experimenting in the mixing and we are easily the beneficiaries.

75) Mother's Milk - Red Hot Chili Peppers
This is the one that introduced me the Chili Peppers and I love it. For me, it was a good starting point but I love where these guys evolved to.

74) Hellbilly Deluxe - Rob Zombie
This was Rob's first solo effort (though honestly, he WAS White Zombie). Some great songs and a truly multi-talented artist. Not everyone's cup of tea, but I like him.

73) Thirteen Tales From Urban Bohemia - The Dandy Warhols
A great psuedo pop-rock album. Love the Warhols. Obviously, this had some good, radio friendly tunes on it. This is my favorite album of theirs.

72)
Never Mind The Bollocks - The Sex Pistols
The first great punk album and easily the best. Their only album, they seemed to be a self-fulfilling prophecy of nihilistic degeneration. Kinda bittersweet that they self destructed, one almost wonders what coulda been but also fears the caricature they could have become.

71)
Automatic For The People - R.E.M
Next to "Out Of Time", their most commercially accessible album. I love this thing. Just a great album that is at moments touching, uplifting, depressing and happy. Good thing.

That's all for now. Hopefully this thing isn't too lame. If it is, well, you're reading it. So, drop it and go read a book....

The next round, 90 - 81. So calm down, already...

Well, I have returned, fellow revolutionaries. It's time for another installment at this jumble of words I call a blog. Again, I continue with my list of "The 100 Greatest Albums--According to Me: 90-81" So without further ado, onward....

90) Give Up - Postal Service
I freaking love this album. Originally just a side project for Death Cab for Cutie's Ben Gibbard and Dntel's Jimmy Tamborello, it's taken on a life of it's own. Getting their name from the fact that their constantly mailing tracks and samples to each other, this project just sounds so good. Just about everybody has heard at least one song off this album. Bonus cool factor: Jenny Lewis (lead singer of Rilo Kiley and solo artist in her own right) shows up.

89) Parachutes - Coldplay
It may seem weird to say now, but I remember when this album first dropped, no one I knew personally had this album or knew of these guys. That soon changed. I just loved it the first time I listened to it, I immediately listened to it again. Great album with some seriously great tunes. I'd say these guys have done okay for themselves.

88) This Desert Life - Counting Crows
One of my all time favorite bands. Of all their albums, this is my least favorite. Having said that, I still love this one. After all, it does have two of my favorite Counting Crows songs(that's another long list): "I Wish I Was A Girl" and "St. Robinson and His Cadillac Dream". Bet your bottom dollar the Crows other stuff shows up on here.

87)
Cracked Rear View - Hootie And The Blowfish
I know, I know. Back before their band's name became a funny one liner ("My name's not Hootie!") and "Fairweather Johnson", these guys were blowing up the country. There are so many good songs on this album (and not just the radio ones that got WAAAYY overplayed), I always found a new song on this album to like. Mainstream? No doubt. Still an entertaining listen? You betcha.

86) Let Your Dim Light Shine - Soul Asylum
Another 90's gem. After making their name known with "Grave Dancer's Union" and the hit "Runaway Train", I wondered what these guys would do next. I soon found out with this album. So many good songs. Their last great album, in my opinion.

85) Siamese Dream - Smashing Pumpkins
Coming in at the tail end of the whole "grunge" thing of the early 90's, these guys were one of the few with staying power (until they ultimately broke up...obviously). This album was their way of saying "Howdy, we're here to blow up your head." A great album best listened to loud.

84) Audioslave - Audioslave
A rebound band made up of the remains of two classic bands (Soundgarden and Rage Against The Machine) that lasted through 3 albums before succumbing. Their first album was easily their best, with each subsequent album making a weaker entry. At first apprehensive of the idea, I gave it a shot. After the inital shock of hearing Chris Cornell instead of Zach de la Rocha in front Tom Morello's guitar, I thought "These guys are pretty good". And after that, I really liked the band more and more. I still prefer RATM, but a good album is a good album.

83)
Turn On The Bright Lights - Interpol
The very first time I heard this album, I fell in love. There was some dark sounding sonic energy emanating from this, but I just dug it. "NYC" is just one of those songs I can listen to over and over. Their subsequent albums have been good as well, but nothing beats your first.

82) Elephant - The White Stripes
One of my favorites (although another Stripes album shows up on the list). Jack White is an amazing artist and with Meg, he has created a very special thing. Garage rock has never sounded this complex. Every song on this album is an assault on your senses, but you won't mind surrendering.

81)
Vegas - Crystal Method
Another influential electronic album for me. This one is just so good. From start to finish, it takes you on a journey through time and space but you never leave the earth. Definitely their best album.

And that's it for now. I'll post the next one in a week or two. Until then, fight the power and don't let "The Man" get you down. Whatever the hell that means.

Yeah, well, your top 100 albums suck too...

Well, today is easily the heights of laziness. In an earlier blog (see here), I mention about how I started this list awhile back, being harassed about it's unfinished nature, yada yada yada, so here it is. I literally just cut and pasted it (though I made some minor tweaks,like linking it and added some album pics), but now that I've moved it, I have to finish it eventually. So here it is, in it's rough entirety.

Side note: My blog this was originally one was on Myspace and I called it "The Queen's Grande Almanac".

Howdy, folk type people, sorry it's been so long between installments. I have been focusing on writing other stuff and...well, quite frankly, I only have so much juice to go around. But I'm here, I'm back for the moment, dwell on the moment and smell the freshly laundered ideas and enjoy the moment.

So, what to talk about in this entry? Well, to be perfectly honest, I'm gonna cheat this time. It's not gonna be some wandering dialogue of my thoughts (though it may give you peak deeper inside me, an idea both scary and disturbing).

I have been reading and seeing people give their top 10 or whatever lists for 100 years (or thereabout) and I said, "Screw it, I could do a better list." Especially both VH1's and Rolling Stone's top 100 album's of all time lists. And that's what I'm gonna do. Not all at once or anything but spread out over several installments of this damn thing.

Now, my requirements and guidelines for this list.
1) To qualify, an album must be a couple of things:

A- 90% or higher listenable (is that even a word?). In other words, you can listen to it from start to finish without skipping more than 2 or 3 songs.
B- Bears up under repeated listens. It's one you can easily see slipping it into a player anytime.

2) This is my list, not anyone else's. There will be stuff on here people might go, "What?" It's not a list of what everyone considers the most important works of music. Say for example I don't add The Beatles "Abbey Road" but I have the Spin Doctors "Pocketful of Krytonite" on the list (Don't worry, that doesn't happen), it doesn't mean I think "Pocketful of Krytonite" is more important in the big picture, I just happen to prefer it to "Abbey Road" (again, not the case). This is just the reasoning that is behind what's on here. Don't agree or don't like my choices? Let me know your thoughts and opinions. Or make your own damn list. Or both.

3) And lastly, these are in no definite order. The only album ranked in importance is #1 because it definitely is my favorite album. Everything is just random order (though I will admit, I did save albums I consider more classic for later in the list, near the top).

So without further delay, here goes the first installment. "The Robot Monkey Top 100 Albums of All Time...so far, at least....Number's 100-91"

100.) Franz Ferdinand - Franz Ferdinand
One of the first of the bands to come out a couple of years ago, capturing that punk/pop/new wave sound like the Killers and Bloc Party. I love this album, it just has such a carefree attitude with a dark underside. Every song seems to hint at a larger story.

99.) Kasabian - Kasabian
Another along the same lines which came out about the same time as Franz Ferdinand. I just plain like this album. Kasabian seems to come out of the gate swinging (their sophomore effort, "Empire", was pretty good). Can't wait to see what comes next.

98.)
Ganging Up On The Sun - Guster
This one has some great songs which are instantly enjoyable. Just can't enough of it. Like start to finish, I love this album. Chilled out, rocking, it just seems to cover all it's bases.

97.)
Her Majesty - The Decemberists
The first appearance of one of my favorite bands on this list. This album has great songs on it and what I love about these guys is their ability to tell a story without it turning into your typical "story song". What's really interesting is you can see the Decemberists evolution from album to album. Folk rock has never sounded cooler.

96.) Psalm 69 - Ministry
This was my first really industrial/metal album. Though I'm not a huge fan of the genre (preferring individual bands than the movement), I love this album. When I first graduated high school and went to college and started taking road trips, I listened to this album a lot and was always amazed how quickly the trip seemed to go.

95.)
The Mirror Conspiracy - Thievery Corporation
Just a great, sit back with an adult beverage or spark a spliff and chill out kinda album. A great mood enhancer. Almost hypnotic in it's effect on me. Eclectic but not jarring. I can't recommend this enough. A great group.

94.)
On and On - Jack Johnson
This was a bit tricky for me, trying to try and decide which Jack Johnson album I would include on here (although I did pick another one or two as well). It was tough. I finally decided on this one because it has the most songs on it that I like. That's it. Nothing too profound. Great album from a freaking awesome artist.

93)
Blue Light, Red Light - Harry Connick, Jr.
Another tricky one for me (this one and "We Are In Love") and again, it came down to which had more songs I liked. Also, this was the first Harry Connick album I was introduced to. Thanks to my friend, Robbie Seay, who is not a bad artist himself (Check out Better Days, out now). He introduced me to this album.

92.) Bringing Down The Horse - The Wallflowers
Bob Dylan's son Jakob does alright for himself on this album. He has his father's soul but sings better. A great album. I didn't really keep up with any of their subsequent albums, but this one absolutely killed. So many great songs.

91.)
Exit Planet Dust - Chemical Brothers
The first Chemical Brother's album I ever listened to. Connected with it instantly. These guys (along with Fatboy Slim, Crystal Method, Bentley Rhythm Ace and Prodigy) really kicked off the '90s surge of great electronic music, mostly out of England. It just starts out with a powerful beat and doesn't let up until the album ends.

And that's it for now. Next time, number's 91-81. Tune in.

My Soundtrack...

I did this awhile back with friends on MySpace. Can't remember what my original answers were, but here's my answers now.

It's a fun little exercise. If your life needed a soundtrack, what songs would cover what moments. Here's mine:

Opening Credits: Chicago - Sufjan Stevens

Waking Up Scene: The Sound of Settling - Death Cab For Cutie

Getting Ready Scene: Young Folks - Peter Bjorn and John

Car Driving Scene: Rolling - Soul Coughing

High School Flashback Scene: Einstein On The Beach - Counting Crows

Nostalgic Scene: One Man Wreaking Machine - Guster

Angry Scene: Killing In The Name - Rage Against The Machine

Agony, Painful Scene: Hysteria - MUSE

Break-up Scene: Fond Farewell - Elliot Smith

Sad, Breakdown Scene: The Transfiguration - Sufjan Stevens

Nightclub/Dance Scene: Diving - 4 Strings

Buddy/Sidekick Scene: Broken - Jack Johnson

Dreaming of Someone Scene: The Way I Am - Ingrid Michaelson

Contemplation Scene: The Legionnaire's Lament - The Decemberists

Love Scene: Rangers - A Fine Frenzy

Kissing Scene: No One Has To Know - Eliot Morris

Relaxing Scene: Lebanese Blonde - Thievery Corporation and First Breath - Explosions In The Sky

Action/Fight Scene: Around The Horn - The Bronx, Scum of the Earth - Rob Zombie and Smack My B**ch Up - The Prodigy

Victory Scene: Treehouse - I'm From Barcelona

Closing Credits: New Day - Robbie Seay Band

Obviously, I reserve the right to change this at any point as my mood changes or come across something better.

So, what would YOUR soundtrack be?

So, I'm visiting one of the many sites I frequent about two months back and it takes me to the Spike TV website for "The 25 Dumbest Band Names". I'm expecting a mountain of hilarity, some gut busting examples and I get stuff like (Are ya' ready? Ya' ready for this?) U2! Bwahaha! Isn't that crazy? Or how about this one? Red Hot Chili Peppers! Isn't that stupid? Hahahah- oh wait....no. No, it really isn't funny. Or witty. Or even dumb. (You can see it for yourself here.)

But it did get me to thinking. What would I say were the dumbest band names? Now bear in mind, there are some bands with weird names that I like or even fit the band But some are just head scratchers. Allow me to present band names I think are dumb. Of course this list is subjective to the reader blah, blah, blah.

Backstreet Boys - I remember the first time I heard of these guys back in the late 90's. It was a night at Subway. I was with my good friend Craig (see here and here
for a recounting of his birthday I did early on in this thing) and this poppy, soul sucking music started and I asked Craig who it was. He said, "The Backstreet Boys". I responded, "Hmm". I do remember thinking "Backstreet Boys? Could be some hardcore mofo's...or a really bad and obvious gay joke." So...make your own joke here.

Nsync - Alright, for some reason, all the boy bands have really stupid names. So this list could turn into a "Boy Bands All Stupid Name List". Which, really, would be like shooting fish in a barrel. Or shooting boy band members with a fan so that their shirts flow around them. The only reason I single out Nsync is because I always hated their stupid name. When I first saw it printed, I was like "Huh"? Then, when I realized it was "in synch", I wanted to punch their parents for not using birth control. I mean really: how dare they?

Mott the Hoople - I know, some people consider this band classic but I always thought they had a weird name. They apparently took if from a novel about a circus freak. Pretty self explanatory, really.

Eh, I've lost interest in this one. If anyone has some ideas, post them and I'll comment on them.

"Do the work for me, minions!" Seriously, it's brain taxing and I've got better things to comment on. Call it a cop out all you want, but...uh...you, uh...smell like poo.


And now, my favorite Eastern European boy group: Shisten Zugulagz Vixiy Kraznazrly (Translated: The Gathering of Singing Virgins of the Worker's Paradise and Car Wash. I think.)